Marking the End of Summer

Dear Summer Garden,

Thank you so much for the tremendous bounty you produced over the past few months. You brought, not only us but many friends and family, so many delicious and fresh meals. There is something very special about food grown and picked in our backyard.

At many points you were giving me so much I had a hard time keeping up with you. I gave away several baskets of food to friends and family. Next year, I plan on planting a couple extra rows and giving food to the Food Bank. How wonderful it will be to share the magic of fresh food to those that don't have the change to experience it like I do, those people who rely on food bank donations of canned food. Will the taste of freshness jump and pop in their mouth the way is does in mine?

The look, feel and smell of a homegrown vine ripe tomato is the epitome of summer to me. I made fresh salsa from the jalapenos, green onions, tomatoes and cilantro that were growing. I ate fresh tomato and basil for countless meal. I picked hundreds of beans, roasted the abundance of orange and red peppers. I discovered new herbs, Summer Savory and Greek Basil this year. And so much more.

I find peace being with you. Tending your rows, feeling your dirt in my hands. I get so much pleasure watching you grow. Mature and bear your goods. But the time has come. This weekend I will have to dig up the remaining plants and say good-bye. I'll miss you, but we'll meet again next spring.

Thank you again for giving so much from my body, mind and soul.

Love,

me.

The Weight of a Child

I've hit another milestone. I have now lost more weight (by one pound) than The Little Miss weighs. I pick her up, groan and complain that she's getting so heavy, and can't imagine that not all that long ago, I had those 27 pounds on me all the time.

Today, I'm officially down 28 pounds. Yeah me.

Consistent Motivation

Every day I take The Little Miss to her pre-school and every day I take the same roads, more or less at the same time. And everyday, I see the same round, plump woman, dressed in black shorts and a big blue visor, walking. Every. Single. Day. I see her on the same stretch of road, some days a little further than others, but none the less, she's there. She's consistent. And isn't consistent motivation the name of the game we're all playing?

It seems we all go in spurts, one day is great, the next, not so much. Or maybe it's a week or month that's good and then, not. And really aren't we all looking for is to be consistent? To find the motivation to keep going. To do exercise on regular basis, to eat well for more than one meal or one day or for one week at a time.

Seems like motivation is very illusive. It seems to wax and wane, making my struggles all the more difficult. It would be nice if there was an easy way find it but where we get our motivation is as individual as each of us. For me, I play head games with myself to get motivated, but works best is if I keep telling myself that I will feel better if I do it. If you exercise, you'll feel better. If you eat this instead of that, you'll feel better. If you do all those things, you'll feel better. I also try and break things down into smaller pieces. If I just do this one small thing and add it to the next small thing, soon enough the links in the chain add up.

I wonder how she gets motivated to take her walk? I wonder what she says to her self every day as she ties up her shoes? I wonder if she does that same little dance in her head, the one that I do, making up excuses on why she shouldn't go. It's too hot, it's too far, my body is sore. But every day she's out there. Consistently. I admire her strength to get out and do it. To do what so many of us struggle to do, when really it should be easy. I want what she has, consistent motivation.

Lucky, Lucky Me

I am lucky. I spent the weekend, a blissful relaxing weekend, in San Francisco. I hit the road Friday after work and got to The City just in time to catch the last of the debate on Friday night. I stayed at my friend's vacation home overlooking Union Square, with views of The Golden Gate Bridge and Alcatraz. Alone. Solo. Just me. It was heaven.

Before I met The Husband, 4 and a 1/2 years ago, and before The Little Miss, I did a lot of solo traveling. I've done many trips by myself and I love the solitude, the adventure of it and the freedom of moving about this world by myself. It excites me. So far, I've never found myself bored or lonely. I've met so many interesting people and struck up lots of conversations with people I would have never talked to if I had been with a traveling companion. Friendships are forged and I have been brought into many groups of fellow travelers, because I was out on my own.

This weekend reminded me of those more carefree time. I could do what I wanted, when I wanted. There was no one to consult with, no one to coordinate with and no one else I had to please, but me. It felt so decadent and indulgent to give up all my responsibilities for the weekend and pretend I was without a care in the world.

No waking up to a child crying in the other room, no laundry, no meals to cook, no cares. I slept uninterrupted, I shopped, I read uninterrupted, I went to art museums, I ate wonderful food and I soaked up the vitality of city life.

The Husband still encourages me to take these trips. He loves having his time with The Little Miss and loves his time alone as well. He loves he can go to the market and get a pumpkin pie and cool whip, he loves he can pack a lunch for The Little Miss that has the "big" cookies in it and loves he can have Buffalo Wings and pizza for dinner. It's his way to have his freedom in this world and the arrangement works for me.

Today, I am energized. I am more patient with The Little Miss. I'm more in love with The Husband because he understands my need for solitude and more in love with myself for not loosing who I am in the transformation of my life over the last few years.

Treadmill Theory of Time

I went to the gym yesterday and, my god, an hour on the treadmill seemed to last FOREVER and I'm sure it wasn't just the uber-stinky guy next to me. Although, after he took his sweaty body and walked away I was a much happier girl. I read a couple magazines and watched Oprah about some mother who after having her second child had to have part of both arms and legs amputated due to some viral infection. I was wiping away the tears and must have looked like a total dork... cryin' at the gym, watching Oprah. I finally had to turn to something else cuz I was such a mess.

And just question for you all because I don't really understand. Why is it that an hour on a treadmill seems *so* much longer than an hour walking outside in the real world? Does working out on a treadmill slow time down?

Have a great weekend everyone... I'm road-tripping again, this time solo to San Francisco. I can't wait!

If Anyone is Interested

This was in my email the other day and thought some of you might be interested since, I know there are a lot of you who watch The Biggest Loser.

_________________________

Hey!

I know that you've been sharing each step of your weight-loss journey with your blog's readers so I thought you might want to take the fellowship to the next level with a new interactive extension of NBC's The Biggest Loser called, The Biggest Loser League. It's an online weight-loss support network where people can set up (or join existing) teams and complete weekly weight-loss challenges while rooting each other on. Here is the link to the site if you'd like to find out more information: http://tbll.nbc.com/

If you set up a team for you blog, I have Biggest Loser sweatshirts that you could give away to readers that sign up :)

Also, the second episode of The Biggest Loser: Families airs tonight @8/7c on NBC. If you missed the first episode, you can watch it here: http://www.nbc.com/The_Biggest_Loser/video/episodes/#vid=642521

Here are some bonus clips that didn't make it into the premiere: http://www.nbc.com/The_Biggest_Loser/video/categories/bonus-scenes/640462/

For more information on the show visit: http://www.nbc.com/The_Biggest_Loser/


Take care,

360i on behalf of NBC

Heidi Klum is Lucky

I felt like I was back in my "clubbing" days, dancing with my eyes closed, letting the music wash over me and moving my body. It was loud enough to feel the vibrations, the lights flashing and putting on a show of their own. Each audience member in a world of their own. Oh, what a night.

The Husband and I went to see Seal last night, in concert at at a small theater, and I loved every minute of it. Where we were sitting, about 6 rows back, the majority of the people were women 40+, who had left their inhibitions at home and were screaming like teenagers. He played to them, capturing the gaze of each and everyone of them. Stares held, in their eyes, just long enough to make them feel just a little bit uneasy. Even I, had my private moment with him, gazing at me, it was just us. Time stood still. There was a brief nano-second where I thought I might ditch The Husband and run off to some exotic island with Seal, but I'm not really sure he's ready to leave his wifey. And then of course, there were the other thousand scantily clad, plastic surgery breasted, nipped and tucked, women that I'd have to beat as I ran off with my new man. Oh well, good thing there's fantasy.

There's something about him I find super attractive and Heidi Klum is lucky.

Speaking of lucky. Friday night, the first night The Husband and I had the house without The Little Miss in the next room, was, well shall we say fun? rockin'? loud? or all of the above. I'm ready for the next Little Miss sleep over since I'm newly stocked with fantasies of Seal.

Oh, and the weigh loss thing? Yeah, that's coming right a long too.